150 | JEALOUSY: The Silent Third Partner in Every Lifestyle Relationship

[00:00:01] DOC CHOCOLATE: What's up? What's up? What's up? Bulls and Queens nation. It is your man, Doc Chocolates, BBC. And I am here with my lovely, beautiful co host, Fun Charlie. And we are with Bulls and Queens, the podcast. And today on this episode, we are going to talk about jealousy, the silent third partner in every lifestyle relationship. [00:00:35] ANNOUNCER: You are now listening to the Bulls and Queens podcast, where we have sexy fun, exploring the lifestyle and swinging exploits of black bulls, queens of spades, cuckold fantasies, open relationships, seductive interracial encounters, and other kinky shenanigans that are sure to get you off in a very good way. So get ready, ladies, and make sure you take notes, gentlemen, because here is your host, that super sexy, bald black man candy, Doc Chocolate. [00:01:41] FUN CHARLIE: Love that. [00:01:42] DOC CHOCOLATE: Now, Charlie, did you know that there's a third partner in our relationship? [00:01:47] FUN CHARLIE: I do now. [00:01:48] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. It's called jealousy. [00:01:50] ANNOUNCER: Jealousy. [00:01:51] DOC CHOCOLATE: And jealousy don't. Doesn't have good pussy or dick. They don't pay the bills. [00:01:57] FUN CHARLIE: No. [00:01:58] DOC CHOCOLATE: Like, like I don't understand why they're a part of our relationship. [00:02:02] FUN CHARLIE: Right. [00:02:02] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. [00:02:03] ANNOUNCER: Yeah. [00:02:03] DOC CHOCOLATE: So we're gonna try to talk about and discuss how we can deal with jealousy. We're going to discuss, are there people out there that never experience jealousy? And then we're also going to discuss what can you do with jealousy if that is something that you are dealing with. Okay, now before we get started, I want you all to make sure you all check out doc chocolatefans.com and on there you can see my only fans. You can see my swinger videos. You can even meet up with me in Las Vegas for essential massage or even a cuckoo session with myself and the beautiful Miss Fun Charlie. And where do people find you at Miss Fun Charlie? [00:02:54] FUN CHARLIE: Ooh, funcharli.com. [00:02:56] DOC CHOCOLATE: All right, and what did they find@funcharli.com? [00:03:00] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, my God. All my spicy videos. All my fun adventures with all of my BBC friends and bi ladies. [00:03:09] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, I like how you said it. You're like, fun charlie.com. and then that was it. She's like, that's it. You better go visit fun charlie.com. i even tell you what's on there. Just go visit it. Just because I said so. [00:03:22] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. Yeah. [00:03:24] DOC CHOCOLATE: But before we talk about jealousy, let's talk about a little bit about what's been going on in our week, our weekend, and all that other good stuff. So what's been going on, going on in your week, Fun Charlie? [00:03:34] FUN CHARLIE: I have had a couple collabs. I had a collab with the veteran to the porn industry. Mr. Shawn Michaels. [00:03:45] DOC CHOCOLATE: Oh. [00:03:46] FUN CHARLIE: It was very fun and super, super interesting. We had very many good conversations on top of good fucking. [00:03:54] DOC CHOCOLATE: You guys did a Halloween theme. [00:03:56] FUN CHARLIE: We did, we did. And then didn't I have another. Crap. I thought I had another collaboration. [00:04:05] DOC CHOCOLATE: I am not sure. [00:04:06] FUN CHARLIE: Nope. I guess that I have one coming up. [00:04:09] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. So, yeah, you actually did have a collab with me. [00:04:13] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, yeah, that's right. Thank you. [00:04:15] DOC CHOCOLATE: I was like, you're welcome. She. See, y' all see how fun. Charlie forgot about little dog Chocolate. She's like, fuck, Doc, Chocolate. [00:04:22] FUN CHARLIE: I knew we did something. [00:04:23] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:04:25] FUN CHARLIE: We did have a scene, actually, and we had pictures and. Yeah. [00:04:29] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes, we did. And so basically, we. There's a lady, a porn star that was in town. Her name is Sydney Page, and. And she was renting out her suites at the Palms Place out here in Vegas. And the beautiful thing about that was it actually had balcony access to it. So by the time we got up there, it was nighttime. And we were able to go to the balcony and get some excellent sexy pictures out there on the balcony. And you can see that on our Twitter and our other social media and all that. It was super sexy, right? [00:05:06] FUN CHARLIE: It was. Yeah, it was very nice. [00:05:08] DOC CHOCOLATE: And so we had our guy, CJ Films. He does a lot of our videography and photos shout out to cj and he's excellent. If you ever need photography, videography, make sure y' all get with cj. We have his links in the show notes. And what kind of shoot did we do? After the pictures that we took, what type of shoot did we do? [00:05:35] FUN CHARLIE: We did an executrix. [00:05:38] DOC CHOCOLATE: Executric scene. [00:05:39] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:05:40] DOC CHOCOLATE: What does that mean? [00:05:41] FUN CHARLIE: So that is when a beautiful lady is there to give you one last night of amazing sex. [00:05:52] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:05:52] FUN CHARLIE: And then kills you. [00:05:54] DOC CHOCOLATE: That I. Wow. She kills you. [00:05:57] FUN CHARLIE: There is a kink that men are into. A woman giving them, like, their last, best night of fucking and then taking their life somehow, usually poisoning, you know, whatever we can get away with on film without being, you know, overt. But, yeah, it's. This is like my second or third one, and it's fun. [00:06:24] DOC CHOCOLATE: Wow. Okay. Fun, Charlie. I am dying to see that scene. Yeah, so I. I'm full of dad jokes, y'. [00:06:34] FUN CHARLIE: All. [00:06:34] DOC CHOCOLATE: So Charlie has learned to just roll. [00:06:36] FUN CHARLIE: With the punches and limit them to. [00:06:39] DOC CHOCOLATE: One a day, three a day. Okay. Yeah, there you go. Compromise. All right, so I also shot with the beautiful Anya Xo today. So that was excellent. And you can actually see her link in the show notes as well. We had a nice little scene At. So that was excellent. And let's talk about Clear. [00:07:10] FUN CHARLIE: Let's talk about it. [00:07:11] DOC CHOCOLATE: What is Clear? [00:07:11] FUN CHARLIE: Clear is where we get tested for our, you know, scenes and stuff. So that we get. We've got all the, all the normal stuff and then we got M Gen and the swabs. And then they're very thorough. [00:07:24] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes. [00:07:24] FUN CHARLIE: But you also, at Clear, they have a wheel that you can spin and win, like extensions on your testing and stuff like that. So it's really nice. [00:07:33] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes. Because like Clear and TTS are typically the two companies that most porn stars, adults, industry people and content creators use for their testing. And it's a full panel test. You're basically testing for chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, hiv, hepatitis C. You're doing oral swabs, anal swabs, and, and Amgen. So every time you see any of us content creators or porn stars, like just fucking bare back and raw. Trust me, we're not just fucking any random ass person. Right. Like, I've literally had like 25, almost 30 tests this year. [00:08:17] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:08:17] DOC CHOCOLATE: Alone. Yeah. Okay. And when we're doing this, usually we are on a 14 day panel. [00:08:24] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:08:24] DOC CHOCOLATE: Meaning that their results need to be within 14 days. Okay. And the testing is expensive, right? Yes, it is. So if you go in for one test, it's literally like 240 bucks out here in Vegas, if you get a monthly plan which is unlimited at Clear, like you can. It's $399 a month, but you can go in and get tested as much as you want. [00:08:53] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:08:53] DOC CHOCOLATE: So basically, Clear, like Charlie said, they have a wheel that you spin. And we both won. [00:09:00] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:09:00] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes. [00:09:00] FUN CHARLIE: You can win extensions on your free month on your month of unlimited. So you can get the extra week. And sometimes that can give you a lot of leeway with your shoots and stuff. [00:09:11] ANNOUNCER: So that's. [00:09:11] FUN CHARLIE: That's really nice. [00:09:12] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes. And hell, even if you're just lifestyle. [00:09:15] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:09:15] DOC CHOCOLATE: One thing that I. Yeah. Because I've been in the lifestyle for almost eight years and very, very few times, Charlie, I can literally count on one hand, did anybody in the lifestyle ever show me test results? [00:09:29] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:09:29] DOC CHOCOLATE: Right. So I mean. Yeah, we're rarely. Yeah. Like, I mean, in the lifestyle, I always play with protection with condoms and all that, but you know, if you're eating pussy, you're giving a blow job. I mean, let's just be real. Nobody's using condoms or dental dams when they're doing oral sex. Let's just be real. [00:09:47] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:09:47] DOC CHOCOLATE: Right. Yeah. So you owe it to yourself. You know, if you're a lifestyle, in my personal opin, you should at least get tested every quarter. [00:09:55] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:09:55] DOC CHOCOLATE: In my opinion. You know, so once every three months. [00:09:59] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:09:59] DOC CHOCOLATE: In my opinion. [00:10:00] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. Agreed. [00:10:01] DOC CHOCOLATE: So anyways, now that y' all know about what we did in our week, let's go to a commercial break and when we come back, we'll talk about jealousy, the silent third partner in every lifestyle relationship. Duh, duh, duh. Pardon the interruption. If you're a cuckold gentleman, a stag, a voyeur, or maybe you're just a woman that likes to watch amateur BBC porn. If you are, I got a question to ask you. Do you want to follow Doc Chocolate's sexy ass adventures in playtime that I have with the most gorgeous hot wives, queens of spades and milfs out there? Now, if you answered yes, then you want to go ahead and pause this episode right now and go to my website@bullsandqueens.com and subscribe to my free onlyfans page. So that's going to be at bulls and queens.com bullsandqueens.com and click that button that says only fans. And what's going to happen is you're going to get free access to my personal collection of videos, pictures of my kinky lifestyle adventures in my playtime that I have with my friends with benefits. And you'll also be able to chat with me and the other fans and also do custom requests. And I am on there daily. So for free access to my only fans for a limited time only, you guys, I want you to go to Bulls and queens.com, click that link that says onlyfans and join the fan club. I'll see you on the other side. Now back to the spicy episode. All right, we are back. So before we get started on our jealousy topic, I want y', all, if you have questions, if you have any topics you want to discuss, if you want to have a cuck session or a sensual massage session with either myself or Charlie or both of us, make sure you send us an email to bullsandqueensmail.com that is bulls and queens@gmail.com and the and is spelled out. Okay, so let's start off with something that Charlie and I have been discussing because we've heard it around the block and we've heard it way too many times. Okay. Yeah. So there are people out there, Charlie. Yeah. That say, I never get jealous. [00:12:53] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:12:53] DOC CHOCOLATE: I have never gotten jealous in my life. Yes. What are your thoughts about that? [00:12:58] FUN CHARLIE: Bullshit. [00:13:00] DOC CHOCOLATE: Oh, say that again. [00:13:02] FUN CHARLIE: Bullshit. [00:13:03] DOC CHOCOLATE: Oh, God bless you. [00:13:04] FUN CHARLIE: Excuse me. [00:13:06] DOC CHOCOLATE: I. [00:13:06] FUN CHARLIE: Okay. I have been a unicorn. I have been in a couple. I have been around so many lifestyle couples, singles, you name it. Every single person who has said they do not get jealous, I have literally seen, seen them get fucking jealous. Literally. Just because you're not self aware of it or you're not talking about it, doesn't mean it's not happening. I can feel that shift. So many women, especially with their partners. If you live with a person and then all of a sudden their vibe, their energy has shifted, you know, so it's like, even if you're saying I never get bullshit, bullshit. [00:13:50] DOC CHOCOLATE: So yeah, yeah, strap in. She says strap in, not strap on. [00:13:55] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah, so that's a different episode. [00:13:58] DOC CHOCOLATE: Oh, stay away from my Charlie. So my thought process on jealousy is this. I personally agree with you. I believe that everybody suffers from jealousy at one point or another in their life. And the difference between people in regards to jealousy is how intense is the feeling of jealousy. And then number two, how do you deal with that human emotion of jealousy? Because it's an emotion. All right, so Dr. Elizabeth Schf, she wrote the book the Poly Polyamorous Next Door. And it was an article that she wrote in Psychology Today. She basically headlined the article by stating, some people truly don't feel jealousy. And then the subtitle below that was, until they do. So some people truly don't feel jealousy. Until they do. And basically what she was stating is that there are people out there and they will state and say that they never experienced jealousy, they don't deal with jealousy. I don't know why other people deal with jealousy, but then when they find out truly what jealousy is and they start looking at themselves and they start doing a self audit about their emotions, they're like, well, God, oh shit. I, I do get jealous every once in a blue moon. Right? [00:15:25] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, yes. And, and my biggest pet peeve are those people that say, well, if you get jealous, you have no business being in the lifestyle. You. Yeah, you. It is not about the whether you get jealous or not. It is how you deal with your jealousy that makes you able to be in the lifestyle or not. Or be non monogamous in general. [00:15:46] DOC CHOCOLATE: Correct, correct. And I personally believe, Charlie, that the sooner we accept the fact that we do experience jealousy to some degree lesser or more, when we do can't come to that conclusion, then we can deal with it. It's just like with Alcoholics Anonymous. Right? Well, what's the first step to getting over that? [00:16:11] FUN CHARLIE: It's recognizing you have A freaking problem. [00:16:13] DOC CHOCOLATE: Recognizing you have a problem. And then once you recognize that you do have a problem, you can deal with it. Right. And so let's start off with the definition of jealousy. Do you want to hear that definition, Charlie? [00:16:24] FUN CHARLIE: I would love to. [00:16:24] DOC CHOCOLATE: Beautiful. So there's two main definitions of jealousy. Feeling or showing envy of someone or their achievements and advantages. And secondly is feeling or showing suspicion of someone's unfaithfulness in a relationship. What are your thoughts about that, Charlie? [00:16:46] FUN CHARLIE: That sounds good. No, it's a good start we've got. Yeah, it's. I think most people, when they hear the word jealousy, they think it usually, I think it means that you're afraid your partner is going to leave or they're more into some. Someone else for whatever reasons. I feel like that's probably what people. You know, I think. And especially before I got into non monogamy, which I was, I was on the non monogamy train, like, for four years before I even got into the lifestyle. [00:17:23] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:17:23] FUN CHARLIE: I hadn't practiced it, but I was like, I'm never going to be monogamous again. I'm not going to get stay home, be the good girl and get cheated on all the time ever again. So that was like, I'm not going to be monogamous. So I had done so much research before I even got to the lifestyle. But yes, that. It's like, I feel like that for the most part, most people, you know, feel like that's what Chelsea is. [00:17:46] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. And that's interesting that you brought that up, Charlie, because I actually never even really thought about it like that. Right. I never really thought about it, as some people are defining jealousy as strictly, I feel like my partner is going to leave me for somebody else. And then that's like, the strict definition of it. [00:18:05] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:18:06] DOC CHOCOLATE: Because if that was the strict definition of it, I never really thought that about, you know, yourself or my ex or anything like that. I never really thought, oh, they're going to leave me for somebody else. Like that wasn't ever in my head. [00:18:21] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. So if I asked you if you'd ever been jealous, you'd say no, absolutely not. [00:18:25] DOC CHOCOLATE: Correct. That's what I thought the definition of jealousy was. I would say that. [00:18:28] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. Yeah, for sure. [00:18:30] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. [00:18:30] FUN CHARLIE: That makes sense. [00:18:31] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. I feel like we're making progress, Charlie. We are. So. And my thought process on the. On emotions and feelings are we all have to recognize that we're all human beings. All right? Unless you're ET Or ELF or when you come from another planet, you're A human being. And we all experience emotions and at the end of the day, emotions, feelings, they are what they are, right? And they change and can change just like the weather. So sometimes you wake up, it's a sunny day, sometimes you wake up, it's a cloudy day, sometimes you wake up and there's a thunderstorm going on. And sometimes you wake up and there's a snowstorm going on. Unless you're lucky to live in Las Vegas like we are and you never see snow. Hahaha. But the fact of the matter is this, just like we don't necessarily have any control over the weather outside, sometimes we don't have any control over the emotions that we feel. But what we do have control of is how we deal with those emotions. So just like we can deal with the weather outside, if it's raining outside, you could put on a poncho or, or bring an umbrella. If it's cold outside, you can put on a beanie or a parka and your gloves on. When we are feeling blue or we're feeling jealous, we can put on our protective clothing and learn how to deal with the jealousy. [00:19:55] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:19:55] DOC CHOCOLATE: Isn't that right Charlie? [00:19:56] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. And it makes it so once you get into it, once you really and you practice doing it, it makes everything so much easier because it's, it's often not actual jealousy, it's often other things. And jealousy is. There's a lot of, you know, books and stuff on jealousy for lifestyle specifically. But basically it's your body telling you you need something, so you need to figure out what it is telling you that you need that you are not getting in the moment. And so that then you start breaking it down into sections or what could it be? Could it be this, this, this, this. And that's where we're gonna. Yeah. [00:20:38] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes we are. Yes we are. Take off and just understand this. Guys, girls, boys and queens, nation, whatever feelings and emotions we have, it's not always logical. So you know, sometimes a woman can wake up in the morning and she's feeling bloated and she thinks that she's like fat or sloppy or whatever. The chick only weighs like 120 pounds. You know, you are by no means large or overweight or anything like that, but she feels that way. You know, you talk to her and she feels like she weighs 500 pounds. You know, it's like you 120 pounds, you a little stick, you know. Right. [00:21:20] FUN CHARLIE: I think a really good example is like when you have one of those really lucid dreams of your partner Cheating on you. And you wake up and you're literally very illogically pissed. Pissed at that person because it feels like they freaking cheated on you. And you're like, I know it's illogical, but I have these feelings, you know, and it's. It. They. Yeah, it's not. It's real. The feelings are real. [00:21:44] DOC CHOCOLATE: I can honestly say I've never had a dream like that. [00:21:47] FUN CHARLIE: I think that happens in women more than men, honestly. But, yeah, I. Yeah, I've definitely had that. And I've woken up and I've been so pissed, and it's just like she. [00:21:57] DOC CHOCOLATE: Was choking me too, in my sleep. Hey, ladies. I love being choked. [00:22:02] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, my God. [00:22:02] DOC CHOCOLATE: I'm a kinky motherfucker. [00:22:03] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, my God. [00:22:05] DOC CHOCOLATE: But, wow. Okay, this new every day. Okay, so. Okay, so let's talk about jealousy versus envy versus fomo. Charlie and I want you to take over this. [00:22:17] FUN CHARLIE: Okay. All right. So when I. This is. This is actually when I got into this and I started learning about this, this is when it really hit home for me and I really started being able to. Because a lot of people, they're like, you know, oh, I'm a jealous person. I could never be in the lifestyle. You know, it's like, I totally get that. Especially the way we are. It's almost a brainwashing of monogamy. This is the only way. This is, you know, this is it. But most of us aren't even taught healthy monogamy. It's. We're not even taught how to communicate or how to argue. [00:22:55] DOC CHOCOLATE: I agree. [00:22:55] FUN CHARLIE: Or, you know, that was like. That was one of. One of the biggest things that we had to learn is like. Or actually, well, actually both of us. But I had to do. And yeah, so there's so many ways of this helping you. And honestly, I think everybody should learn this stuff. It's not just non monogamy people, but I agree. So, okay, so when you feel jealous, you start to look at it and go, okay, am I actually jealous? Am I envious of somebody else? Do I want something of theirs? Do they have something that I, you know, that I want, that I need? Something, some kind of quality they possess, some kind of item they possess. Maybe they're just gorgeous and you just want that beauty. Whatever. That's kind of more on the envy side of things. [00:23:40] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay, okay. [00:23:42] FUN CHARLIE: So then also there's fomo. And that is basically fear of missing out. That is a. That I'd say. I think a lot of people fall into the FOMO category more. It's just Basically, you know, they're gonna go have a good time and you're not gonna be a part of it. And it's a huge thing, especially for people who, if you've been married for years and years and you are glued at the hips and all of a sudden this person is gonna do something crazy cool that you're not involved with, you know, and that is, that's insanely hard to even think about that happening. [00:24:21] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. [00:24:22] FUN CHARLIE: One in. Very, very, very good thing that I learned in the process was there's a thing that when, when they're coaching you to get into the non monogamy, when, when they're trying to teach somebody not monogamous to get into non monogamy. [00:24:39] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:24:40] FUN CHARLIE: One of the things that you do is called emotional detachment. [00:24:44] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:24:44] FUN CHARLIE: Because like, there's so many things that romanticize the, the two people becoming one, you know? [00:24:52] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. [00:24:52] FUN CHARLIE: You're united and you're one and you're, you're one. You're one soul. You're you, you know? And then there's the joke. We share a brain and sound. [00:25:00] DOC CHOCOLATE: Right? Yeah. Hey, hey. Like you taking me back to my church days. Like they said, a man shall leave his mother and become one with his wife. [00:25:10] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:25:10] DOC CHOCOLATE: And you shall cleave onto her. [00:25:13] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, fuck. Yeah. So it is like, it's romanticized, so we embrace it and you get into it, but then you're so. It's almost a codependency on your partner because you're glued at the hip. Everything you do, you've lost yourself basically. So you've become this entity and you don't, you can't even fathom what it would be like to do separate things, you know, if you don't keep that healthy boundary. And a lot of people think that emotional detachment is caring less about somebody, but it's being able to care about them just as much, but from a healthy distance with the proper amount of space so that you can be individuals. [00:25:55] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, yeah. And I like that, Charlie, just because obviously you and I have both been in long term marriages. So you were married for 20 plus years. I was for 24 plus years. And the one thing I noticed is, is when I'm partnered up, obviously you and I, we've been together for a year and a half, is I couldn't really see myself doing things individually or separate from my partner. Right. And so basically what you're saying is obviously as a couple, you do things together and you do become one in that aspect, but you need to retain a form of individualism. About yourself. [00:26:38] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, that is actually, that's perfect. And a good example is whenever the relationships that I've had, after I've learned all this stuff, anytime I start feeling like I need to control them or I'm losing control or like a possessiveness, that's when I'm like, oh crap, it's happening again and I need to detach. So I'm getting too can. Like I'm, I'm losing myself and I'm kind of leaning into everything you're doing and I'm not remembering I'm a separate person and I've got shit to do. And you know, it's, it's like a kind of a tunnel vision kind of thing, I think too. But then, so then I kind of step back and go, okay, I need like, it's there. It's a mental process and you definitely want to read up on it. It's. It's emotional detachment and it does help, but it's hard to explain in a, in a short podcast situation, but. And it takes practice. You get, you get to where you're. You can do it a little bit easier. But as soon as I start feeling like I, I'm any kind of controlling with you, that takes me back to my monogamy days and I'm like, okay, gotta get myself right again. So, okay, that definitely helps. It's like the first step in letting your partner be an individual again. You know what I mean? And allowing yourself to be an individ schedule again. [00:28:01] DOC CHOCOLATE: I love that. I love that, I love that. So. And let's share a time when we were jealous. Like, can you share a time? I feel like this is like sharing. [00:28:10] FUN CHARLIE: Oh my God. [00:28:10] DOC CHOCOLATE: Can you share a time when you were jealous? One Charlie. [00:28:13] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. Yes. Okay. In the lifestyle, it is tricky and. Okay, so as far as some, some of your jealousy can come from past relationships, which a lot of my past relationships have been. Or a couple main ones have been very. Either toxic or up and down with shady stuff. [00:28:42] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:28:43] FUN CHARLIE: We'll say. And so there you. You get to where you just don't have trust. And you. As soon as something happens, which we. They use the word triggered nowadays and it's almost overused by philic. But if something that happened in your past starts happening in the future or in the present or it seems like that it's going to trigger you. And so you, you know that self awareness and stuff is important. But so I'm trying to, I'm like. But okay, Jealousy, yes. I, most of the time when it's Actual jealousy. Jealousy, man. I'm trying to think of a time. [00:29:27] DOC CHOCOLATE: That you had jealousy. [00:29:29] FUN CHARLIE: Well, a lot of the time it's either fomo. I. It's not. So I get. I. You know, every woman, especially women, have times of insecurity, so they're. When you compare yourself, especially in the lifestyle, that is a. It's. It's a recipe for disaster. It is so hard to not do. [00:29:49] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:29:50] FUN CHARLIE: But it is. It's definitely a recipe for disaster. I will say this also. Okay, okay, we'll get it, actually. We'll get that. [00:29:59] DOC CHOCOLATE: So you. [00:30:00] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. One time that I felt jealousy, and I'm trying to, like, pinpoint something, so. [00:30:05] DOC CHOCOLATE: You go, okay, okay. One time that I feel jealousy. [00:30:08] FUN CHARLIE: Thank you. [00:30:09] DOC CHOCOLATE: I never feel jealous. [00:30:10] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, my God. [00:30:11] DOC CHOCOLATE: Kidding. Obviously. Yeah. So when I was with my ex wife, we were trying to still navigate the lifestyle and she had difficulty playing together. And so we basically evolved into basically doing our own thing. So we would go to swinger parties together, but I would be the one who's the hoe out there playing. And, you know. Yeah. Usually she'd be kind of hanging back and whatnot and this and that. Right. And so the thing that she evolved into doing my ex was she likes going to nightclubs and getting picked up by guys that were visiting Vegas. Right. And so one time, one of her play partners that she had was a guy, and he was based out in California and Atlanta, so he had homes in both places. He was in the tech industry. And so during that time, she would, like, fly out here, fly out there, you know, spend weekends with him and whatnot. And I was cool with that. I think I had conversion, which we'll talk about here later on in the episode. But the thing that just like started burning me was when I asked her, hey, just for safety reasons, because you're flying off to a different state. [00:31:44] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:31:45] DOC CHOCOLATE: Can you let. Let me have, like, you know, short phone conversation with the guy, a little five minute conversation just so that I can feel comfortable. And then, you know, that was a huge blood argument between me. [00:31:57] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, okay. [00:31:58] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. Because the way I was trying to explain to her is, okay, let's say you fly out there, right? And then all of a sudden you end up missing. Yeah, right. [00:32:09] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:32:09] DOC CHOCOLATE: What the hell am I gonna say to your mother, to your sister? Yeah. To the cops, like, and I'm gonna tell them, oh, yeah, my. My wife, she went out to go fly to see another guy, and that's the last time I ever heard from her. And I tried calling her on the phone and it was just going straight to voicemail. They're gonna look at me like, what the type of man are you? [00:32:34] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:32:34] DOC CHOCOLATE: You know. [00:32:34] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:32:34] DOC CHOCOLATE: You just let your wife, your woman go out and you. You. You crazy. [00:32:39] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:32:39] DOC CHOCOLATE: You know? [00:32:40] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. Yeah. [00:32:40] DOC CHOCOLATE: So, like, I was just like in a rage. [00:32:42] FUN CHARLIE: Okay. [00:32:43] DOC CHOCOLATE: Feeling totally jealous. [00:32:44] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. Okay. [00:32:45] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. [00:32:46] FUN CHARLIE: Interesting. Okay. That. Well, my brain's going crazy because. And then every time I think of something, I'm like, oh, I don't know if that's quite jealousy or not, but okay. I did think of something. Okay. Okay. So anytime I do feel actual jealousy and stuff, it's usually when the other. The woman that either you're playing with or wanting to play with or you're doing content with less so with content just because it's. It's like, that's our job. So it's a little different brain compartment. But when they have. It's usually. And that's not. That could be envious. But if they are more successful or they are, you know, prettier or they have other. They have other qualities that I look at myself and I'm like, it's not, you know, it's. I'm not level or measuring up or whatever. [00:33:43] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:33:43] FUN CHARLIE: Okay. So that can be envy. But I think when it's not something you want to possess but you're like kind of more comparing and it's more of a insecurity thing, that's when I start to get into my head. [00:33:58] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. And that's fair because, you know, that is part of the definition of jealousy is having envy about somebody over their advantages. Right? [00:34:07] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:34:07] DOC CHOCOLATE: And I mean. Yeah. Even me, like, you know, I'll get like a little bit jealous, you know, if you get with the guy and he's like super tall. And it makes me feel some type of way because I'm only like 4 foot 5. [00:34:17] ANNOUNCER: Yeah. [00:34:18] FUN CHARLIE: Like, you are not proof of life. [00:34:21] DOC CHOCOLATE: So. But like, ORV is like this big monster dick, you know, a little bit jealous. You know, it's like, you know, I mean, I got above normal dick, you. [00:34:33] FUN CHARLIE: Know, but you have a perfect dick. [00:34:36] DOC CHOCOLATE: Thank you. Thank you. But, you know, I get. I get jealous when I see these motherfuckers come out with some Shaquille o'. [00:34:41] FUN CHARLIE: Neal size cocks, which is totally understandable, you know, and it's the same thing for me, like, huge tits. It's like, okay, I don't have huge tits. Huge booty. I mean, I'm a white lady. I've got a freaking no ass and no tits. [00:34:56] DOC CHOCOLATE: White girls are getting asses nowadays. [00:34:59] FUN CHARLIE: God damn it. [00:34:59] DOC CHOCOLATE: It's not just the black ladies and the Latina ladies. They got booties. I love your Latina and your black booties, by the way, but white girls have booties too. [00:35:09] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah, right? Yeah. [00:35:10] DOC CHOCOLATE: But, hey, little booties matter too. [00:35:12] FUN CHARLIE: Little booties. So. Yes. Yeah, it's usually when they have pink you so much, when they, you know, they have the. They possess qualities that I think I'm lacking in or whatever. And that's usually. And it. It's. It's so hard not to compare yourself. It really is so hard. But so I would say that is a lot of the. The issue. Sometimes it's fomo, but I get over that really quick. Like, I'm just like, you know, let him freaking have fun, you know? [00:35:36] DOC CHOCOLATE: Thank you. [00:35:37] FUN CHARLIE: You're welcome. I try. But I do want to touch on a couple things, because in the lifestyle, there are specific things that can happen. One of those is called angst. And I don't know if everybody. Actually, I had not heard of it until I met you. [00:35:57] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:35:57] FUN CHARLIE: I knew what. I knew that feeling, but I didn't know what it was called. Okay, so angst we were talking about earlier, did you write the definition? Oh, I did. Okay. Oh, wait, I don't see it. Yeah, I don't think. Anyway. Oh, wait, I'm sorry. Anyway, so angst is kind of like, okay, you. You decided to. You're gonna watch your partner fuck for the first time, and you're like, fuck, yeah, I'm gonna do it. It's gonna be hot. I've been looking forward to this. You get there, he's fucking, and, oh, my God, you wanna die and rip the woman's hair out. Like, all of a sudden you just feel anxiety and. And just horrible. Oh, wait, I did. Feeling of deep anxiety or dread or feeling of persistent worry about something trivial. Now, the trivial part I don't necessarily agree with, but I know it's the definition, but that's kind of what angst is. And so that can feel like jealousy, but I feel like it's a little bit more like buyer's remorse. Like you. That's kind of one of those situations. You don't know that you're jealous until you. You're jealous. [00:37:09] DOC CHOCOLATE: You know that you're jealous. [00:37:09] FUN CHARLIE: You know, and that can happen to veterans of the lifestyle. Correct. [00:37:14] DOC CHOCOLATE: So even people that are experienced lifestyle couples. [00:37:16] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:37:16] DOC CHOCOLATE: That can happen to them. Right? Yes. [00:37:18] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:37:18] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay, so jealousy is normal. Angst can be normal. [00:37:22] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:37:22] DOC CHOCOLATE: Right? [00:37:22] ANNOUNCER: Yes. [00:37:23] FUN CHARLIE: And it's just, again, how do you deal with it, you know, are you gonna freak out, blow up, you know, embarrass your partner? Embarrass. You know, a lot of the times angst can be taken care of with a, hey, can we get a timeout? I need to have a convo with my partner. And maybe you just need a little bit of reassurance. You need things to slow down a little bit that can save a whole night. That just taking a few minutes to talk to your partner can take. Save a whole night of fun. The other situation. So there are multiple things that, that can be mistaken for jealousy. And I, I happen, I, I like reading forums, especially lifestyle forums. [00:38:07] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:38:07] FUN CHARLIE: And there's. There are patterns of things that I see. One of those things is where. [00:38:19] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay, so we had to pause because Charlie. [00:38:22] FUN CHARLIE: Had a brain fart. [00:38:23] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. And then she choked me. [00:38:25] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah, I choked him. [00:38:26] DOC CHOCOLATE: She got jealous because I don't get brain fart. No teasing. So. [00:38:30] FUN CHARLIE: Okay, so sorry. One of the patterns that I see a lot is either men complaining that the woman is jealous or they're just different situations where jealousy is thought to be in place, but it's actually something that they're needing from their partner or, or it's something that their partner is doing and they need them to not do or whatever. [00:38:57] ANNOUNCER: So. [00:38:58] FUN CHARLIE: And also in the lifestyle, there can also be this feeling of, okay, the best way to explain it is if someone wants to fuck you. [00:39:10] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:39:11] FUN CHARLIE: Okay. [00:39:12] DOC CHOCOLATE: And nobody ever wants to fuck me. [00:39:14] FUN CHARLIE: Never. I know it's ridiculous if somebody wants to fuck you, but they have not shown the respect to me and to us and to our relationship. And they're not reading the vibe that either us. That we are giving together or that maybe I'm having some angst or some jealousy and they are not picking up on my, on my awkward vibe or my uncomfortable vibe. [00:39:41] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. [00:39:42] FUN CHARLIE: That can give you the biggest ick on someone faster than anything. And I have talked to so many lifestyle women and it's the same across the board. If a woman doesn't do her due diligence to make sure that she recognizes you in the relationship before she even is trying to fuck your partner, it's going to give you a bad taste in your mouth. That is not necessarily jealousy. It's just kind of a lack of respect of the other person. So now you don't have a good feeling about them. I hate when this happens so much because. And the reason, one of the biggest things, it's like the person that I should have been most jealous of handled and still continues to handle that role Exceptionally. And because of that, I have zero jealousy. And she's the one person that I probably should have the most jealousy over. So it's like there are so many and there. [00:40:44] DOC CHOCOLATE: And you're talking about like a play partner. [00:40:46] FUN CHARLIE: This is. I can say her name because we're gonna have them on Amy. [00:40:49] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. Yeah. Ca. Unicorn girl. [00:40:51] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. So when I was meeting her for the first time, she. Before. Well, when we met her, she did have a boyfriend. But at the time I was being told about her, she was single, she was a little younger than Doc, she was a gorgeous woman, blonde, little cutie, big tits, great ass. And I should have been so jealous and so worried and so kind of insecure, but immediately. And now this girl is a veteran unicorn lifestyle woman and we're actually going to talk to her and her partner fiance on a regular basis and have a roundtable because we have a really interesting perspective from them. But. Woo. [00:41:35] DOC CHOCOLATE: Podcast four song baby. [00:41:36] ANNOUNCER: Woo. [00:41:37] FUN CHARLIE: So, yeah, so she. I should have been jealous with her, but I have never been jealous with her. And so it's because she has been very cool with me. She shows the respect. She. She reads the room. She does it. She's not crazy, you know, doing things that our dynamic obviously doesn't involve. So understand that that is not necessarily jealousy. It is a feeling. And that person has not done their due diligence to make you feel comfortable. And so that. That's not necessarily the same thing. The other huge thing that I see a lot is men complaining that their late. Their ladies are jealous. [00:42:14] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. Okay. So are we talking about gender differences then? [00:42:18] FUN CHARLIE: I'm gonna say for the most part it's men and women get a bad rap because we are very emotional. So yes, I'd say gender differences. I'd say the people that mostly say I'd never get jealous are men. [00:42:33] DOC CHOCOLATE: I would agree. [00:42:35] FUN CHARLIE: I have heard it from a few women, but mostly, yeah, mostly men. [00:42:38] DOC CHOCOLATE: Mostly men. And then usually I've actually never heard a woman say that she has never been jealous. [00:42:45] FUN CHARLIE: I have had one and I was like. Because I saw her get out. [00:42:48] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. [00:42:50] FUN CHARLIE: And then so there's that. Okay. Yeah. So mostly men complain that their partner is jealous and they can't figure, you know, they're just like, they're so tired of it. They get totally pissed off. They're, you know, and a lot of the times the male is also the faster person. [00:43:11] DOC CHOCOLATE: Correct, Correct. And I feel like that leads to expressed jealousy being emitted by females, typically over men, just because us men, we tend to typically move faster. [00:43:25] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:43:26] DOC CHOCOLATE: So What I've seen is when there's jealousy that is expressed, like overt jealousy, you know, I see it more from the ladies. [00:43:36] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, yes. Now understand that jealousy can be something that you're needing for your, from your partner, whether it's something they do or stop doing or whatever. Maybe it's a boundary that needs to be put into place to make you feel more comfortable, but that. So understand that if your partner is moving faster, if you have expressed feelings about a person and then your partner is pushing back on you. Now understand that there are many reasons that people could be pushed back. It doesn't necessarily mean that they don't care about you. A lot of that is resolved with learning how to communicate and how to argue. It freaking makes a 100,000 times difference. [00:44:26] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes, it is. [00:44:26] FUN CHARLIE: We will have a podcast on that on another day. But understand that there are things that you might be doing that is making it harder for your partner to get out of that jealousy state because you're pushing back or you're going too fast and you refuse to slow down. And so it's like the best way to function in the lifestyle is to create as little, I'd say, waves as possible. Is the smoother you can do it, the less damage you're gonna do. If the, if you're creating damage, you're slowing down your process. And this is all a process. Like. Yeah, the boundaries you put in place now will definitely change. Like in a month to six months they're going to be so different. [00:45:18] DOC CHOCOLATE: Correct, correct. And I mean, that's true of the lifestyle in pretty much every aspect of it. [00:45:22] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:45:23] DOC CHOCOLATE: Like lifestyle isn't a destination. [00:45:26] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:45:27] DOC CHOCOLATE: In my personal opinion, it is the journey that you take of evolution because you will always evolve and you will always, always change. Right. So what you do one month may not be what you do the next year or two years from now. So expect evolution. Expect it to be a journey and you're never gonna reach that destination. [00:45:47] FUN CHARLIE: No. [00:45:48] DOC CHOCOLATE: And so I would like to say this. There is a difference between healthy jealousy versus toxic jealousy. [00:45:58] FUN CHARLIE: That's a good point. [00:45:59] DOC CHOCOLATE: Thank you. [00:46:00] FUN CHARLIE: I love that. [00:46:00] DOC CHOCOLATE: I love you. [00:46:01] FUN CHARLIE: Love you. [00:46:03] DOC CHOCOLATE: So healthy jealousy is basically you having like the instinct to protect your partner. Right. So you're, ah. I'm gonna make sure that I protect you. You know, like if I see some thug, big creepy guy trying to like creep up behind you, I'm gonna, you know, rip out his throat. [00:46:26] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:46:26] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. That was maybe exclusive. [00:46:28] FUN CHARLIE: Okay. [00:46:28] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, those are a little bit. Yeah. [00:46:30] FUN CHARLIE: So maybe talk to him first. [00:46:31] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. Yeah. I'll talk to him first. And then there is toxic jealousy, which is what we see more often. [00:46:37] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:46:38] DOC CHOCOLATE: Which is basically you're trying to take control where you shouldn't and even worse, you're trying to punish the person. [00:46:47] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, yes, yes. [00:46:48] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. [00:46:49] FUN CHARLIE: No bueno. [00:46:49] DOC CHOCOLATE: No bueno. No bueno. No. Good. Right. In case you don't speak Spanish. Yeah. All right, so we're going to take a break right now and when we come back, we are going to discuss real life scenarios that are commonplace in the lifestyle with couples when they are experiencing jealousy, envy, fomo, all that other good stuff. And then we're also going to go ahead and talk and bounce around ideas on what can I do to help this? What can I do to overcome this? How, how can I deal with these emotions? So here goes our commercial messages and we will be back. Hey there, cucks. 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Then go now to hotwifetrainingday.com to get started. Now back to the episode. Doc Charlie and Fun Charlie are back. Make sure you check out my fun stuff@doc chocolatefans.com and make sure you check out Fun charlie stuff@funcharli.com all right, so we are continuing to talk about jealousy. All right. In the lifestyle. [00:49:10] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:49:11] DOC CHOCOLATE: And we want to talk about real life scenarios that many people go through. And heck, you're probably going to encounter one or more of these as you go through the lifestyle. [00:49:23] FUN CHARLIE: So Charlie, so, so these are like four scenarios or situations if you see your partner flirting heavily or enjoying someone. [00:49:33] DOC CHOCOLATE: Else more so this happens when you're at a lifestyle party, and let's say you see me, I'm over there looking like a Happy Meal, and I'm talking to a wife, and, you know, I'm kind of like, ooh, flirting with her, like, kissing up on her, and I'm doing it way too heavy. And I know this has happened with us a couple of times. [00:49:57] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, definitely. It is. It's way more there. There are so many levels to this, because if you are not used to. In my past playing experience, we would. We would friends, you know, lifestyle friends, and be around those people. But we weren't necessarily, like, constantly. If we were with those people, we weren't together and. And seeing each other other than FL. In a situation. We weren't seeing each other, like, be intimate or making out or, you know, holding anybody for any amount of time outside of. So that is a new thing that I'm having to work through. [00:50:39] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay, that makes sense. That makes sense. And me, I'm just like, a little, you know, just. I just. [00:50:46] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:50:46] DOC CHOCOLATE: I'm just kissing everybody, you know? [00:50:48] FUN CHARLIE: You are. Yes, you are. And I love watching you. It's just. It's usually when I have trouble. It's usually when you have a history with that person. If. If it's more than just a fun fucking friend situation, that's when I. When I get a little bit more. It has. It's. It's definitely harder to watch. [00:51:07] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, that makes sense. [00:51:09] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:51:09] ANNOUNCER: Yeah. [00:51:10] FUN CHARLIE: Okay. Second one is feeling left out during play session. And now I've had this. This is. I think this is every person in a threesome. There's always somebody that is left out for a. But it. It. It's inevitable. Like, there's, you know, there's only so many holes, so many things you can grab, so many things you can put in your mouth. [00:51:31] DOC CHOCOLATE: And especially every woman has three holes and five holes. If you're getting creative. [00:51:38] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, yes. And especially, like, if you. [00:51:41] DOC CHOCOLATE: Hey, I was a slow burn. [00:51:42] FUN CHARLIE: I did just. [00:51:42] DOC CHOCOLATE: Hey, you. Hey. You're like, I know the first three holes. What are the other holes? [00:51:47] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah, the fourth hole is behind the knee. [00:51:49] DOC CHOCOLATE: Oh, yeah. Okay. [00:51:51] FUN CHARLIE: Okay. So some of you family guys will get that one. So, yeah, if you're left out during a play session, and I have felt this at first when we. When I would do threesomes, I did not know what the fuck to do with myself if the person was. If too. If the. If the. Usually. Unless it's an mfm, if it's an FFM or an fmf, where the women aren't playing together necessarily. Necessarily. But we're fucking the same guy. If the guy and the other woman are in missionary, there's not a lot of room to, like, I'm talking face down missionary, there's not a lot of room to help out or add to it. So sometimes I will step back and just kind of watch or, you know, step back and just give you guys, take a break for myself and then give you guys some solo time. [00:52:40] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. [00:52:40] FUN CHARLIE: But it is an awkward situation. So that is something that you want to talk about, to navigate. It helps. [00:52:46] DOC CHOCOLATE: Correct. And that's why communication is so vital and important, because you did tell me about that, and that was something that I never really thought of. But when you told me about it, I'm like, okay, well, that makes sense. You know, if I am up there and I'm fucking the girl in missionary style, and I'm chest to chest, stomach to stomach, genitalia to genitalia with her, that leaves you absolutely no room to do nothing. Unless you're gonna put, like a strap on in my asshole, which that ain't gonna happen. [00:53:16] FUN CHARLIE: It's usually not the best. Yeah. I mean, I could get in there. It's not easy to eat your ass when you're on missionary and stuff like that. Yeah. [00:53:24] DOC CHOCOLATE: And she likes eating my ass. [00:53:26] ANNOUNCER: I do. [00:53:26] DOC CHOCOLATE: I like eating ass too. [00:53:28] FUN CHARLIE: But yeah. So there. You definitely have to talk about it there. Definitely. Definitely. You have to get. It's not always something that you can just jump into and know what you're doing. You know, there's so many awkward situations. [00:53:41] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes. So before you jump into that pussy, make sure you jump into a conversation with your partner. [00:53:45] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [00:53:46] DOC CHOCOLATE: And the one thing that we resolve to do is if I am in missionary, let's say I will. I may be chest to chest with the woman for a little bit, but, like, I pay special attention now, Charlie, to make sure that, okay, maybe I can kind of be up on my knees and then she. The woman. Other woman is still on her back. [00:54:08] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:54:09] DOC CHOCOLATE: But, you know, I'm kind of in a knee position where I'm kind of kneeling and I'm fucking her. [00:54:16] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:54:16] DOC CHOCOLATE: But then you have room to, like, do whatever you want with her titties or kiss her or sit on her face or whatever. [00:54:23] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah, yeah. I mean, there's a lot of different things to do and it does take practice, though. Yeah, but. And then talking to your partner, because he wouldn't have known that I felt left out during those times. And sometimes I don't feel left out. I'm grateful for the break. Or I do like to watch you. So sometimes I just step back just so that I can watch. And you know, that works too. But it definitely just takes talking with your partner. [00:54:47] DOC CHOCOLATE: And one time that I felt left out of the play session. And you, Ms. Charlie, handled it perfectly. [00:54:54] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, thank you. [00:54:55] DOC CHOCOLATE: Do you remember what time I'm talking? [00:54:57] FUN CHARLIE: I do. It was a. I was as shocked as you were. This never happens. Usually. Usually people are trying to go through me to get to your deck. And so it's like, you know, I feel like you are the other way. [00:55:07] DOC CHOCOLATE: I feel like you are underselling yourself, Ms. Charles. [00:55:10] FUN CHARLIE: I'm just saying, when it happens. Yeah. [00:55:11] DOC CHOCOLATE: So basically what happened was we linked up with a couple at a pool party. And so we went to the back to play. And so when we went back, the guy was with you and I was with the other lady. And so I think where she's giving me a blow job and then like you and the other guy are fucking. And like, what happens is I'm having a little bit of trouble getting my dick hard, right? And so it's acting kind of intermittent. And then one thing, you know, that happens to all of us guys, you know, no Shane, you know, no Shane in my game. And after a few minutes, the guy kind of went in and he's you hard. And you know, you're making all types of noises because you make a lot of noises. You're just squealing and just living your best life, getting right. And so I'm still trying to get my dick hard, but, you know, I'm reading the room and I'm moving fast, you know, because I'm like, okay, you know, I gotta make sure I get my dick hard. Right? And so, you know, I tell the lady, okay, let's jump into missionary because I don't want her like sucking my half limb dick, you know, while you're getting pounded. [00:56:21] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah, right. [00:56:21] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, you get to take it to pound town. And so I asked her, okay, let's get into 69. And then the lady basically says, no, I just want to watch them. She was basically talking about you guys. Yeah, she's like, I just. I just want to watch them. Yeah, right? [00:56:38] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:56:38] DOC CHOCOLATE: And so, yeah, like you said, that made my half limp dick all the way, you know, because basically at that point is almost like you are like disrespecting me and you're not even wanting to work with me and you have basically excluded me out of the situation, Right? [00:56:57] FUN CHARLIE: Yep. Because she didn't just watch. [00:56:59] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, she didn't just watch. She went in and I think she started, like, licking his balls. Her husband's ball calls while he was you. [00:57:07] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:57:07] DOC CHOCOLATE: Right. [00:57:08] FUN CHARLIE: So now. [00:57:08] DOC CHOCOLATE: And so basically, she instantly took me out of the equation. Right. And so the thing was, we had only. Me and her had only been playing for about maybe three, four minutes, you know, and so at that point, I'm not gonna just sit there and watch, you know, because, like, I'm feeling disrespected. So I just left. [00:57:27] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. You know, and I didn't know. Yeah. And I did not know what happened. And I didn't even know right away that you had left, because I was like. As soon as she was licking his balls, I was like, you. You must not be doing anything. So I was like, I need a dick in my mouth. You know? But then by that time, you were gone, and I was like, oh, something happened. Because you never leave a situation like that. [00:57:49] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yes. Yes. Yeah. Because, like, when I got up and I was about to leave. Yeah, you did kind of make that motion. Because Charlie makes this motion where she's like, ah, ah, ah. Pointing a finger. Yeah, she's pointing a finger towards her mouth. And, like, dick goes here. And I was like this. I kind of gave her emotion. Like. Yeah, no, I'm good. [00:58:04] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:58:04] DOC CHOCOLATE: You know, and then I walk off. Right. So I'm not. I didn't storm off angrily. [00:58:08] FUN CHARLIE: No, no, like that. [00:58:08] DOC CHOCOLATE: I tried to storm all. Well, not storm off, but I tried to walk off very kindly, politely, you know, a little smile on my face, you know. But, you know, Charlie instantly knew that something had happened. So I went to the bathroom across the hallway. And so after about maybe, I think about a minute, minute and a half, you kind of, like, came in and was like, oh, is everything okay? [00:58:33] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:58:33] DOC CHOCOLATE: And I told you about the situation, and I basically said to you, Charlie, I said, no, no, I don't want to mess up the fun time. You go back, you have fun. I just can't be in the room. Yeah, right. [00:58:45] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:58:45] DOC CHOCOLATE: And, you know, at that point, you were like, oh, no. Yeah. You're like, no, no, hell, no. You know, that's not. That's not the arrangement. Right. Which I felt so good. [00:58:54] FUN CHARLIE: I love that. [00:58:55] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, I felt so good. Right. And so basically the issue at hand was we still had our stuff in the room, so somebody had to go back and get our shit. [00:59:04] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:59:05] DOC CHOCOLATE: Right. And so, like, I walked into the room, and I tried to do it quietly and gingerly. And so by this time, the Guy and his wife, they were fucking, and she was. Was laying on her back, and he was kind of there and kneeling missionary style. And so I went to go quietly grab your stuff of my stuff, which, you know, I'm looking to make sure I get all of our stuff because it's a dimly lit room. [00:59:31] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:59:31] DOC CHOCOLATE: And then he's like, oh, hey, hey. Is everything okay? Is everything okay? [00:59:34] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:59:35] DOC CHOCOLATE: And I kind of gave him, you know, sign, like, you know, kind of smiling. I was like, oh, no, no, no, we're good, we're good. You know, we'll. I kind of gave him a thumbs up because, again, I'm not trying to cause drama or anything like that, you know, and then he's kind of, like, looking at me like, like, what the hell happened? Right. [00:59:51] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [00:59:52] DOC CHOCOLATE: And so anyways, we walk off, and then maybe about 15, 20 minutes later, after him and his wife got done, the guy, he walks over to us and he's talking to us, and he's like, oh, what? What happened? And then you. Basically, I was gonna explain to him what happened, you know, in a politically correct manner. [01:00:12] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:00:12] DOC CHOCOLATE: And then before I even spoke, you're like, no, no, let me handle it. [01:00:17] FUN CHARLIE: I got this baby. [01:00:18] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, I got this baby. And so she. Charlie, told the guy what happened, and the guy was like, oh, oh, really? I didn't know. And then. But he basically said, okay. He had this confused look on his face. And then he basically was like, okay, well, we'll go with that. [01:00:37] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. Very, very disrespectful. It was so rude. And I mean, it immediately discounted any. Any kind of feelings or any kind of accountability or anything in there. And it's like, okay, for one, it. I believe you weren't getting that great of oral in the first place. That's. [01:01:00] DOC CHOCOLATE: I wasn't. I was not. But, you know, I try not to, you know, know, say, if you're trying. [01:01:08] FUN CHARLIE: And you're doing, hey, that's great. But here's the deal. If the guy. If you're in a foursome and it's a swap, if the guy is having trouble, at least give him a hand, like at least three to five minutes of trying to help him get things going. Sometimes it's harder to get things going. We were outside, we were drinking. You know, there's a lot of things going on. And for once, the guy was actually bringing it a little bit too at the same time. And he was more sensual, which I usually get, the hard fucker. So that was nice. And so there were a lot of things Going on. And. Yeah, so the woman didn't even try to help you out. She immediately said, you know, she's gonna watch us. And then for about a minute, and then she started joining in. And it's like totally leaving you out of the situation. And that is not fucking cool. If they wanted to play with me solo, they should have asked that we. We are very open that we will play solo if the situation is right. So it's like they. They could have just asked, but. And it. It just felt like that's what they were trying to do. It was weird. And so. And that we're usually. They're trying to get your BBC and it's usually a hot wife trying to get you alone instead of, you know, lady and a couple trying to get the unicorn. It's. It was interesting situation. [01:02:29] DOC CHOCOLATE: Charlie undersells herself. Like, there's so many people that want to get her as a unicorn. [01:02:35] FUN CHARLIE: Well, but he's usually not. We're just past the point where people get us as a couple trying to get me a solo. You know, you're a little bit more. We're at a lot of hot wife things. So usually in that situation, you are way more on market. [01:02:53] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay, that makes sense. [01:02:54] FUN CHARLIE: In demand. [01:02:55] DOC CHOCOLATE: That makes sense. Okay, that does make sense. [01:02:56] FUN CHARLIE: So, yeah, so. But yes. So that is. Those are a couple situations where we have felt left out. [01:03:02] DOC CHOCOLATE: Exactly. [01:03:02] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:03:03] DOC CHOCOLATE: So thirdly, we're talking about real life scenarios. Jealousy after an amazing encounter. [01:03:09] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:03:09] DOC CHOCOLATE: All right. Yes. So basically, your partner had an amazing encounter, and they come back and they're like, oh, wow, he rocked my world. [01:03:17] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. Yeah. [01:03:18] ANNOUNCER: Oh. [01:03:18] DOC CHOCOLATE: Oh, my God, I felt his dick in my liver, my spleen, my kidneys. I just got rocked. You know, or, you know, the guy comes back and he's like, oh, my God, that pussy. [01:03:29] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:03:30] DOC CHOCOLATE: Oh, my God, it was screaming shit. [01:03:33] FUN CHARLIE: You know, and sometimes you don't even have to say anything sometimes. I mean, you know your partner so well, you can tell when they're on cloud nine. And it, you know, it's clearly from the sexual encounter you had just an hour ago. So it's like. Yeah, you have to. [01:03:49] DOC CHOCOLATE: You have to dial it down. You know? So, like, if you're the partner who had the amazing encounter. [01:03:54] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:03:55] DOC CHOCOLATE: What I've learned to do is to dial that down. You know, I'm not gonna go like, you know, I'm just gonna be like, I had a fun time. [01:04:04] FUN CHARLIE: Oh, my God. Yeah. You know, But. But sometimes it's like, okay, unless you ask. Unless I'm asking for details or Or I'm like, okay, you can admit that you had a good time. You know, I can tell that you had a very good time. I might be having a hard time with you having a hard, you know, a great time, but I am literally, I am very genuinely happy for you. And honestly, a lot of the times, if you can focus on being happy for them that they had a good time, that can help a lot. And that's a little bit of a compersion situation that we'll talk about here in a few minutes. But just being happy for your partner and trying to lean in to that and not think about the. The this, even whether you saw it, whether you didn't see it, it's. It can be difficult. And it feels like, especially if I know sometimes I'll get, like, fucked, you know, exceptionally hard, or somebody will, you know, a guy will do something, and sometimes you'll come back and be thr me harder than you usually thumb. Like, what the. Where the. Did this come from? [01:05:10] DOC CHOCOLATE: And you're like, and the reason why I do that is because you're making all types of noises like. Like when that guy is you. Like, it sounds like there's bloody murder and homicides being committed and shit like that. The Neighbors done call 911. They thought that there was some, you can, you know, pussy wreck. So I'm like, I'm gonna write that pussy, too. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, you scream like that, too. It works both ways. [01:05:30] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, it does. It does. And it's like, you know, he may not have said anything, but I definitely can tell he had a few feelings about, you know. [01:05:38] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, yeah. My anger. Fuck you. Yeah. [01:05:40] FUN CHARLIE: Anger. [01:05:40] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah. Yeah. [01:05:42] FUN CHARLIE: But yes. And then the next thing is social jealousy, which I totally. Okay. One of the things that I told doc before, you know, we both kind of exchanged lists on what. What we were wanting in a person, and. And I was like, okay, but you have to be okay with being my social. [01:06:01] DOC CHOCOLATE: My social coordinator. [01:06:03] FUN CHARLIE: Coordinator. Thank you. I have a very, very small social battery, and I am horrible at keeping up with people, especially if I don't know them very well on a regular basis. It's exhausting for me. It's, like, mentally exhausting. So he does handle a lot of that, but it also. We actually just actually had a conversation about this and figured it out. But it's like, I also can feel a little dejected or a little FOMO because he is the person that talks to all these people, and it's like, well, nobody's talking to me or nobody's hitting me up and he's like, you know, that works both ways. You have to actually hit them up to have them hit you up, you know, so it's like, I totally get that. Or if your partner has way more appeal, like without just visual appeal, without even meeting them, or they have. They have a very open vibe where people usually come up to them and they're not really talking to you or not coming up to you or whatever. There's. It. There's definitely jealousy feelings when that. When it comes to that stuff too. That can make it harder. [01:07:10] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, that. That does make sense. So. So, Charlie, let's talk about how do we resolve this? So if all of us lifestylers are going to. To feel some type of jealousy at some point in time, like, how do we deal with that? You know? [01:07:25] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:07:26] DOC CHOCOLATE: So we have five different principles that y' all can use. Okay. The first one is have very clear boundaries. Okay. So before you go into a party, an encounter, a situation, you again, here goes that word. Communication. [01:07:46] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:07:46] DOC CHOCOLATE: That's a lot of syllables. [01:07:47] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. Yes. [01:07:48] DOC CHOCOLATE: So you need to talk about what is okay and what is not okay before you actually go into that playtime or encounter. Okay. [01:07:57] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:07:58] DOC CHOCOLATE: And as we discussed, your lifestyle journey is going to be one of evolutionary tactic. Yes. So things are going to change. So you need to, in my opinion, you need to talk about that probably, if not every single time you go into an encounter, at least on a monthly basis. [01:08:17] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah, it depends on how much you're playing. But you should be over talk. You should be so tired of talking about stuff that you're not doing it right. If you're not tired of talking about stuff, I agree. It's like, I can't talk about this anymore. Like, I don't want to freaking think about it. But you have to talk about it. You have to get it out. I highly recommend looking at forums. Reddit's got a really good swinger forum. There are really good forums, like in your area, for lifestyle, on Facebook and stuff, read through what people have already experienced and talk about what you guys would do or do differently. That is very helpful. [01:08:54] DOC CHOCOLATE: Beautiful. The second thing is have safe words. [01:08:58] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:08:58] DOC CHOCOLATE: So whenever you feel, let's say, emotional or physical overwhelm or something is happening, and let's say you are in the midst of play. So let's say you have a foursome or a threesome situation. My opinion is you need to have like, let's say a red light, green light, yellow light situation. [01:09:16] FUN CHARLIE: Right. [01:09:17] DOC CHOCOLATE: Real green light means, hey, where to go Yellow light means, hey, slow the fuck down. And red light means stop. Right. And it doesn't necessarily have to be red light, green light, yellow light. Because that may be too obvious in certain situations. [01:09:30] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:09:30] DOC CHOCOLATE: Where you're trying to, you know. Yeah, yeah. Because I know if I'm somebody and the guy's like, red lights. I'm like, what? Oh, what did I do? Right. [01:09:40] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:09:40] DOC CHOCOLATE: So it could be something as simple as having a look, or one thing that you said, Charlie, is, hey, if I tap your foot. [01:09:48] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:09:48] DOC CHOCOLATE: Or if I squeeze your leg or I pinch you. [01:09:50] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:09:51] DOC CHOCOLATE: This is what that means. [01:09:52] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. Yeah. [01:09:52] DOC CHOCOLATE: Right. [01:09:52] FUN CHARLIE: So we don't. I don't have to actually get your visual eyes on my eyes. I can, you know, give you a little thing, and that tells you, hey, I need to check in. [01:10:00] DOC CHOCOLATE: Correct. Correct. It's just like, even, like, for those of you guys and ladies that watch football, it's just like if they're at the line of scrimmage and before they're about to hike a ball, maybe the quarterback does, like a finger signal on his helmet chest or whatever, and everybody on the offense knows exactly what the hell he means. Right. [01:10:18] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:10:19] DOC CHOCOLATE: So, yeah. Have those safe words. [01:10:21] FUN CHARLIE: Very important. And I highly recommend the middle. [01:10:23] DOC CHOCOLATE: Go Raiders. [01:10:25] FUN CHARLIE: I highly recommend a middle safe word that you. That either you use yellow or you have something that represents something where you're close to red but not quite there, because I feel like that gives you so much leeway, and it allows you to warn the part. Your partner without stopping play. So you can give them a, hey, this is. We're getting to a point, but I don't want to stop the vibe. And, you know, and so that person can check in and go, okay, perfect. I can slow. Stop doing this or ease up on this or whatever. [01:10:57] DOC CHOCOLATE: I love that. I love that. So, yeah, you need to have some type of word or gesture for red light, green light, and yellow lights. And I feel like actually using those words is probably better if you're not actually with the couple or the single. Right. So if we want to, like, say something, like, real quick, like, let's say there's a couple that we're talking to, and you remember there was a couple where we had our tests and they were looking at their tests and there's something a little bit off. [01:11:30] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:11:30] DOC CHOCOLATE: And, you know, we're like, all right, green light. [01:11:32] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. [01:11:34] DOC CHOCOLATE: You know, we can say that real quick. [01:11:35] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:11:36] DOC CHOCOLATE: And we know what the other person. [01:11:37] FUN CHARLIE: Like under our breath and. Yeah, yeah. So. [01:11:40] DOC CHOCOLATE: So it helps. The third thing is debriefing after events. So. Or encounters parties, whatnot. So basically, after the lifestyle event, party, hotel, takeover has happened, you want to just talk about, okay, honey, what worked, what didn't work, you know, and just have a meeting of the minds. Right. And again, that's communication. [01:12:04] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:12:04] DOC CHOCOLATE: All right. Fourthly is practicing conversion. Yes. So conversion is a very strong keyword in the lifestyle, isn't it, Charlie? [01:12:14] FUN CHARLIE: It is. [01:12:14] DOC CHOCOLATE: All right. And conversion basically means or is defined as feeling joy for your partner's pleasure. I will repeat myself. Conversion means or is defined as feeling joy for your partner's pleasure. All right. And you could probably further define it by saying you feel joy for your partner's pleasure in spite of your feelings or emotions of jealousy that you may be currently experiencing. [01:12:43] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, yes, yes. But if you find yourself constantly having to push yourself past something like jealousy or whatever to get to conversion, make sure you're not overlooking something or burying something that you actually need to talk to your partner about, because that can just make it worse. So. [01:13:07] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, correct, correct. But overall, you know, you should feel good if your partner is having a fun time. But obviously, yeah, you don't want to go too far to the extreme of sacrificing your joy. And they experience all the joy and mental health as well. [01:13:24] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. And I will say conversion is not necessary to be in the lifestyle. You do not have to actually feel joy for your partner. Partner. But I promise you, it does help if you can kind of go towards conversion. You may not ever get to a point where you're just like, I'm so excited my partner's gonna go out and get, you know, but you might be able to, at least to get to a more neutral place. [01:13:50] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, I. I personally feel like you should have conversion. Right. Like, you should try to gravitate towards it because it's like. Because, like, okay, we're doing it together. Right. Or. Or even separately. But like, even if, like, let's say I'm feeling some type of way because let's say you're on a play date or whatnot. I should, you know, okay, maybe I'm feeling a little bit jealous, but you know what? I am happy for you, Charlie. You know, you go do it. Right. [01:14:14] FUN CHARLIE: Yes, yes. And that does help a lot with jealousy. Like, if you try to focus on the fact that they are getting to do something fun, maybe they don't get to do it very often. Whatever. It does help a lot. [01:14:25] DOC CHOCOLATE: Yeah, yeah. And so lastly, on ways to help or deal with jealousy is fifth, use jealousy as a Feedback for personal growth. So we all live one life, and that life is very, very short. And I believe, again, we're talking about journeys. We're all on a journey of personal growth, you know, trying to make ourselves better people. Better today than we were yesterday and better tomorrow than we were today. So every time you use or experience jealousy, what can I learn from this? [01:15:00] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. Yeah. Agreed. [01:15:01] DOC CHOCOLATE: Agreed. [01:15:02] FUN CHARLIE: I love that. Yes. [01:15:03] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay, beautiful. So let's talk about personal reflections, Charlie. Okay, so what have you personally learned from experiencing jealousy? [01:15:13] FUN CHARLIE: Okay, so working through the jealousy, learning, reading all that stuff. Stuff I've learned so much about myself and why I feel the way I feel or when I feel the way I feel, I love. I love the fact that I've learned all this because it does help. It helps with your mental health in a huge way. But. And we. We're in the roundtable, we're gonna do talks with the. So we are a unicorn, edible bull that have met in the lifestyle. [01:15:45] DOC CHOCOLATE: Correct. [01:15:45] FUN CHARLIE: They are also a unicorn and a bull that have left met in the lifestyle. There is a definitely a different level of tools and stuff that you need if you have met in the lifestyle versus if you've been married for years and years and you've got this trust and you've got all this built up. So understand that when you meet in the lifestyle and you're trying to have a relationship, relationship, you've got to have a lot of compassion and understanding and a lot of more, I would say a lot more communication and a lot more tools and stuff because it's so much more difficult. And as soon as you start having feelings, it. All of that stuff is so much harder. So. But I would absolutely. It's like, as far as jealousy goes, find out why you are jealous, because I promise you, most of the time it's not even fun freaking jealousy. It is everything else. And it's so much easier to work through when you know what it is. [01:16:41] DOC CHOCOLATE: That is very beautiful and well said, Charlie. And what I would tell people that are new, right? Because many of our listeners, Charlie, they are new into jumping into the lifestyle, or maybe they're testing it out, they're trying to learn about it. That's why they're listening to the podcast. Right? [01:16:57] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:16:58] DOC CHOCOLATE: And so what I tell a couple that is wanting to enter into the lifestyle about handling jealousy is, number one, know that it's going to happen. Number two, because you know that it's going to happen. Give yourself the tools to handle jealousy in a very positive manner so that it doesn't Become toxic. Jealousy. [01:17:21] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:17:22] DOC CHOCOLATE: Number three, have a form of compersion. You know, try as much as you can to feel joy for the partner, but obviously it shouldn't be something where they're always experiencing constant joy and you're not experiencing anything or you feel like you're sacrificing yourself. Obviously, yes. Fourthly. Communication. Communication. Communication. It needs to happen before the encounter, during the encounter, and then after the encounter. And then last but not least, fourthly is you want to make sure that you understand that this is a journey. [01:18:00] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:18:01] DOC CHOCOLATE: Okay. It's not a destination. You know, you've never arrived. You know, you're always learning. You're always getting better. You are always sharpening your ax. Okay. Just keep that axe away from my dick. [01:18:14] ANNOUNCER: Yes. [01:18:15] DOC CHOCOLATE: Thank you. I love you. [01:18:16] FUN CHARLIE: Nice. All right, I will say I'm gonna add this real quick. There are scientific studies that show you your emotions are almost predetermined. You can change how you feel about something. You can change how you react to a feeling or a thing. [01:18:37] DOC CHOCOLATE: I agree. [01:18:38] FUN CHARLIE: So understand that your emotions are not uncontrollable. You can learn how to deal with those emotions better. And you can learn how to not have certain emotions by training yourself. And it's. It's a habit. It is. It's like learning a new skill. [01:18:58] DOC CHOCOLATE: I love it. Yeah. And once you learn that new skill, it's just like riding a bike. Maybe you haven't ridden a bike in 20 years, but hey, you know what? You put a bike in front of you, and you put your ass right in that seat and you can ride, baby, Ride. [01:19:11] FUN CHARLIE: Yeah. [01:19:12] DOC CHOCOLATE: So. So in closing, we invite you, Bulls and Queens Nation, to share your stories. [01:19:21] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:19:21] DOC CHOCOLATE: All right. About jealousy conversion. Things that you may have gone through or heard other people gone through. Heck, maybe you have some questions over something or anything that we said. Maybe you want to add something. [01:19:35] FUN CHARLIE: Yes. [01:19:36] ANNOUNCER: All right. [01:19:36] DOC CHOCOLATE: Maybe you freaking disagree with what we said. Right? We want to hear. Yeah, Let us know. All right. [01:19:42] FUN CHARLIE: Bring it. [01:19:43] DOC CHOCOLATE: Bring it, baby. You know, send your emails to bulls and queens gmail.com. bulls and queens gmail.com. we will include that email address in the show notes. And we're going to end with a quote. Ms. Charlie, take it away, baby. [01:20:01] FUN CHARLIE: Oh. Jealousy doesn't mean you're broken. It means you care. What matters is what you do with it. [01:20:09] DOC CHOCOLATE: That is so, so sweet. So until next time, Bulls and Queens nations, we love you. You're awesome. You keep pushing forward. You be positive. Have fun and all that good stuff. Bye. [01:20:27] ANNOUNCER: Bye. Thank you for listening. Listening to everybody's favorite black man candy. Doc Chocolate of the Bulls and Queens Podcast. If you would like Doc Chocolate to help you host your next fun and kinky private party, or you want info on his next monthly Las Vegas Bulls and Queens play party, or you'd like to have him pose as a nude or semi nude model for your next girls night out or bachelorette party, make sure you go to www.bullsandqueens.com right now and fill out the form on the website to contact doc again. That's www.bullsandqueens.com. until next time, bulls, queens and cucks stay sexy SA.